


Friday the thirteenth

by Indrel



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Armitage Hux Needs A Hug, Crack, Friday The Thirteenth, Gen or Pre-Slash, Hux-centric, M/M, Phasma Ships It, Poor Hux, but Hux has a crush, everyone ships it, there isn't really a relatioship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-13
Updated: 2017-01-13
Packaged: 2018-09-17 07:14:09
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,027
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9311126
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Indrel/pseuds/Indrel
Summary: Hux has REALLY bad luck





	

**Author's Note:**

> Yeah, so today is friday the thirteenth and what fits better than making Hux suffer because of it? I actually feel a bit sorry for him. 
> 
> This is un-betad

Hux woke up at 5 am sharp by the beeping of his alarm. He blinked a few times and yawned before stepping out of his bed and onto the cold floor of his quarters. Hux then began his day as he always do; with a shower.

Hux stepped into the 'fresher and took of his First Order approved pyjamas. He then got into the shower and turned it on. One of the few luxuries about being the commanding officer on the ship was that he got real water instead of sonic. And warm showers were one of his absolutely favourite things. He let the warm water wash over him and chase away the last of the coldness in his limbs. Hux momentarily turned of the water to soap himself and put shampoo in his hair. Then the worst thing that could have happen happened. He somehow broke the handle. And not only did he break it but he broke it so that the shower could only be turned off or on the cold setting. Hux cursed. He really didn't want to get back in under the water but still had to wash of the soap and shampoo. He cleansed his jaw and then jumped back under the stream. Immediately the cold water made him shiver so he washed off as fast as he could and then hurried out of the shower.

It was then; wet and shivering of cold, that Hux noticed that he didn't have any towels. He cursed again. His cleaning droid must have gotten his orders wrong and hadn't gotten him new towels as he had asked for the day before. Since he was still wet and shivering Hux decided that the only thing he could do was take one of his blankets and use it to dry of.

When Hux went to pick out some clothes he made an unpleasant discovery. Every single one of his white underwear had been coloured pink in the wash. Not that he didn't like pink, but they had been coloured pink by accident, not by choice, and it was also against protocol. Hux cursed but he needed to get dressed and since he didn't have another option he put on one of the pink underwear.

When he was dry and dressed Hux finally began feeling warm again. The coffee and slice of roasted bread he ate helped. Then he went back into the 'fresher to style his hair and brush his teeth.

Hux used one hand to comb his hair and the other to apply the hair gel. Since he was occupied with getting his hair right he wasn't watching what his left hand was doing. That turned out to be a huge mistake. As his left hand went to scoop up more hair gel he accidentally pushed the container from the shelf it stood upon. From the corner of his eye Hux saw it fall to the floor and hit it. The gel inside flew everywhere. Hux cursed again. He crouched to see if he could salvage any of the hair gel but soon had to realise that there was nothing left in the jar. He cursed yet again. That had been his last jar of hair gel and he wouldn't be getting any new ones until Monday. When he looked back into the mirror he couldn't help but curse a couple of more times. He had applied hair gel to about half of his hair but he hadn't gotten to the other half jet. This resulted in the most ridicules hairstyle he had ever seen. One half of his hair was slicked back into its usual style while the other half was a fluffy mess. Hux cursed again. There was no way he could salvage this. The idea to use the gel that lay on the floor disgusted him and to use the shower to wash all of the gel out wasn't really an option with it stuck on cold. He really didn't want to get back into it.

Then he got a brilliant idea. Why not use his cap to hide his hair? Sure, he usually only wore it on special occasions and people would notice and maybe think that it was weird that he wore it today. However that was much better than letting everyone see the mess that was his hair at the moment.

Fifteen minutes later Hux stepped out of his quarters. He immediately made his way towards the bridge to begin the day's first shift. Hopefully nothing more unfortunately would happen today.

***

Hux had almost finished his first shift of the day and lunch was coming up. No one had commented his choice to wear the hat, sure no one probably dared to, but still, it made him feel better. And since nothing else unfortunate had happened Hux had begun to relax, which turned out to be a huge mistake.

Hux was talking with Lieutenant Mitaka about something of minor importance when his datapad fell from its place upon a console and to the floor. Hux cursed. He should really stop doing so since he was running out of swearwords.

Hux bent over to pick up the datapad and while he did so there was a loud sound of fabric tearing. More precisely, it was the sound of the back of his pants tearing. Hux felt a flush spread over his face. He was still leaning over; not daring to move just jet and several people in the room had turned to stare at him.

Hux thanked whatever god that may or may not be listening that he was wearing his greatcoat. It covered the tear in his pants so that no one could see his pink underwear. He collected himself, picked up the datapad and straightened his spine. As calm as he possibly could Hux turned towards Mitaka.

"You have the bridge, if anyone needs me I'll be in my quarters." Mitaka hurriedly nodded and Hux walked out of the bridge as fast as he dared without making the hole in his pants larger.

To get to his quarters Hux only had to walk down two corridors. Since he didn't want to have to run across the whole ship if there was an emergency Hux had made sure that his rooms was close to the bridge. His office was even closer, it was only a few doors down the corridor from the bridge and he would have gone there now if it weren't for the fact that he for once didn't have a change in there. He had only yesterday decided to send the clothes to get cleaned. It was almost like the entire universe had conspired to make his day as worse as possible. And as if to prove it Kylo Ren was walking towards him in the corridor.

_Stay calm Hux, stay calm_ , he tried to tell himself, though it was not working. He began walking faster in hopes of passing Ren before anything else happened.

They closed in on each other and Hux began relaxing again. Ren didn't seem to notice that anything was off and they were so close to each other now that surely nothing would have time to happen before they had passed each other.

How foolish of him to think so.

When Kylo was only two steps away Hux tripped ... and fell right at Kylo.

With a shout of surprise they collided with each other. Hux's head hit Kylo's helmet so that his hat flew away and he became dizzy. However that was not the worst thing. Because when Hux fell Kylo reacted by catching him in his arms. When the fall was hindered Hux found himself leaning backwards in Kylo's arms as if they were about to do a dip kiss. That Hux hair was ruffled only made it seem more like they had kissed. They stared at each other in shock and Hux could feel his face getting even hotter than before.

As if to make matters worse at that moment Phasma stepped out of the doors to the officers' mess hall just a few meters away. She stopped short at the sight before her and stared at them for a second or two. Then she shook her head and muttered something that sounded suspicious like "Get a room" before walking away.

Hux tore himself from Kylo's arms. He couldn't look at Ren for the moment, it was just too awkward. And it didn't help that he had imagined a situation just like that many times before, though it had ended differently. Instead he hurried to pick up his hat that still lay on the corridor floor. He really didn't want anyone else to see his failed hairstyle. However as he bent over to pick it up his pants tore again. Hux froze _._ Then he swore as vicious as he could. His pants had ripped all the way to the front so that his pink underwear was in clear display to everyone.

After a moment of contemplation Hux realised what he had to do. He closed his greatcoat as much as he could do when his arms weren't in the sleeves and then he stood tall. Hux took a deep breath and then began running as fast as he could towards his quarters. He did however not come far.

As Hux was about to pass the doors to the mess hall petty officer Thanisson stepped out of the doors and before Hux could react they had collided. They crashed together with a yell and a bang. And all of it was in front of every single officer in the mess hall _and_ Kylo Ren. The worst thing was however that not only did his hat fall off in the collision, but his greatcoat fell off his shoulders. So not only had about a hundred people seen him collide with Thanisson and fall to the floor. They also got a great look at his messy hair _and_ pink underwear. At the moment Hux's face was even pinker than the underwear.

Hux abandoned the last of his dignity and crawled forward until he could find his footing and then ran to his quarters as fast as he could without bothering to stop and pick up his hat and greatcoat. He just ran.

When the doors to his quarters closed behind him Hux yelled and cursed alternately for a few minutes before he calmed down.

He would have to send all of the officers that had witness his shame to reconditioning and drink himself senseless so that he could forget about the incident. And it was best to start right away with the later.

Hux picked up a bottle of brandy and made his way towards the sofa. However before he could reach it he somehow managed to drop the bottle so that it broke against the floor. Brandy and glass flew everywhere. Hux stared at the mess for a moment, cursed and then went straight for his bed without attempting to clean it up.

Without bothering to undress in case something else happened, Hux lied down on his bed and decide to just call it a day and go to sleep. Perhaps tomorrow would be better. He only had to report his decision to take the day of and then he could sleep.

Hux opened the datapad and found the right file. He filled in everything he had to and right before he would sign it and send it away he noticed something. Hux checked the date once more. January the 13th, Friday. Friday the thirteenth. That explained everything.

Hux stared at the date for a few minutes before he said every single curse word he knew. Then he sent away the file.

Hux sighed and attempted to place his datapad on the nightstand but of course he missed it and the datapad fell to the floor and broke against it. This time he didn't even curse. Hux just closed his eyes and fell asleep. Tomorrow would be better and hopefully no one would remember all the embarrassing things that had happened today. That was highly unlikely, but Hux could always hope.

**Author's Note:**

> The almost dip kiss is inspired by a tumblr post where someone tell the story of how they accidentally dipped someone while trying to stop them from falling on their nose and someone said "Get a room" to them. 
> 
> If you want you can visit me on my tumblr evilspaceboyfriends-trash.


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